content top

Shades Of A Blue Orphanage

Shades Of A Blue Orphanage
Well here I sit listening to Thin Lizzy, ‘Shades Of A Blue Orphanage’ no less.  Yes I have a copy on CD digitally re-mastered and all sorts of bonus tracks that disturb me. So the question you are asking did I sell my Soul and whats the story with Eddie Prevost? And shame on you who are wondering what I am talking about, do you know nothing ? Did you not read THE FUNKY NOMAD provisos, its what it all about. Now click the link and catch up will you, goodness gracious me unbelievable. ( Yes I know I asked you to subscribe and thanks) So now we are on the same page did I sell my soul, well I don’t think so but it had me a bit worried, had I accidentally made a deal at the crossroads. Does making an offer on the interweb constitute a contract with unknown arcane powers? Probably not, or maybe yes, its hard to tell at this point. In truth I found out a while ago 2010 that this had been re-released, I bought a copy a few months back but have not admitted to it for various reasons. Will the journey now be over for riseanddeardemise.ca has the purchase of Shades killed the whole premise? And of course what of Eddie Prevost. Nothing is straight forward in the world of the Funky Nomad, if it was what would I have to blog about, what would keep me up at night. Question, why didn’t I just go buy it when it came out if it was so important to me, walk over to HMV place an order and just buy it. To be honest it seemed a bit like cheating. In theory I could take the whole list of missing albums pay the price and there they would be. But its not the same, I went to the record store the first time round, both new and second hand (Impulse in this case, that’s where I found Shades. (Of course I did not buy it new, it came out in 1972.) So for those of you sinners asking who the hell is Thin Lizzy? I feel truly sorry. I can say this. Thin Lizzy played their last gig 28th August 1983 at Redding Festival (Well at least for me) Phil Lynott died...

Go Beaver & Big Ribs.

Go Beaver & Big Ribs.
So what do you do when you turn off Facebook ? Well it looks like you keep tuning it back on, by accident as my Flicker account signs in via Facebook oh yes that’s the feed in the bottom right corner of this blog in case you missed it. So if you want an explanation I build 40K models sort of accidentally  # 1 Son wanted to get into it so I had parts left over and as usual got carried away 5 years later still building stuff. If you don’t know much about this affliction I build Space Marines and all the stuff here is heavily converted or concept stuff. So now you know. Oh and its also on the Games Workshop Group feed too I am the “FunkyNomad” surprise hey and yes I know I can’t paint, but I can build glorious crazy shit and it keeps me out of trouble. So I hear you all begging to have a look at what I am currently building. ( Sure you did)  and while we are at it we can have a little look around the Funky Nomads subterranean lair ( Ignore the box Tsunami, I have a bit of a box fetish) I know you are all excited I will even throw in a hand made PAC MAN Halloween costume that took 5 days to build thanks to a how to on YouTube, #1 Son was a great hit got interviewed by the local radio station and has so many photos taken his buddy stopped talking to him.     Well hardly a Tsunami from this side but if you could just look the other way deffinatley more boxes.  Anyway back to you wanting to see what I have been up to model wise ( Its  a Forge Master Dreadnaught and it aint legal) the sooner we do this the better because I am going to post pics anyway, (Realistically you probably don’t need all the Nerdy details so I will resist you don’t care what this thing is armed with. You do! Surely not, didn’t think so.)   so now that’s done I can get on telling you all about Beavers and Big Ribs. So I asked myself once I did the deed (Facebook disconnect) did important stuff I put on Facebook disappear ? cos I...

Facebook Disconect.

Facebook Disconect.
So what? Am I just a cranky old git who does not see the beauty of the wonderful people at and on Facebook?  Am I a teenager escaping parents, schools, teachers, bullies,  cyber-stalkers and other dubious denzines of the book to get all crazy on Snapchat, Instagram,Weheartit, kiki or what ever. No, I am just an aging no-body late to the game; I was late in and late out. ( Oh yes that icon means I have deactivated my face book.) I had thought I was ahead on the curve on this bail out but if the reactions I got in my house were anything to go by I am the last to catch on, like I have only just found out Sliced Bread is a good idea. #1 Daughter has an account not been active for 3 years, #1 Son has an account hardly ever uses it ( I guess it was in action in grade 7 ) My Wife has deactivated both her accounts sometime before Christmas so just bumbling old me. What lead to this Rise and Dear Demise of Facebook accounts in the Funky Nomad household. Well I can only speak for myself and and its not simple, not being one for clarity I did some digging around some self examining, research and what have you and I can say its entirely possible this is not what the Interweb is supposed to be, this is not what social networking is supposed to be  and we can add some familiar names to those first against the wall come the revolution. You can ignore the next bit its a bit of a ramble, disclaimers and that sort of thing. ( Now I feel obliged just to mention, no one is going to actually be shot with bullets etc, its more a call for accountability for  those that trample beautiful things in the headlong rush for mammon or get it wrong in a way that effects the rest of the people trying to participate in life in some sort of meaningful way. As my wise Uncle has mentioned recently don’t be too fast to recommend death for politicians etc . ( The etc is a very long list of which I was about to add a few more.) What I will do instead is throw up some things...

The World of Gibbous Tyke

The World of Gibbous Tyke
I know someone is going to point out that I should probably put this in the control docs or the book its-self, but having already penned 3600 words in those docs and a severe need to get on with it and as I only figured it out Boxing day I thought I would world-build right here. To give assurances to the naysayers and show it can be done.   (There is no reason it can’t appear later in the story. This is an incognito Blog after all and I have no followers, who the hell is there to read ahead.) So sitting here listening to Jethro Tull  “Broadsword and the Beast”  and well if you are going to free-form a fantasy world you need suitable music, if it takes too long I have my Led Zeppelin ready to go. (I did a map thing the other afternoon and am going to use some of my daughters colored pencils to tart it up a bit and no doubt I can post it on the blog for you all to marvel at. One time pass no erasing, what you see is what it is going to be.) Talk of the devil here it is and NO THAT’S A CAMEL (of the dromedary persuasion, I know a song about that but that’s off the point a bit.) So how far do you have to go with this world-building lark? Probably not all the way Tolkien, probably not the Earth just enough stuff to tell the story. Just in case you think I am a real moron I do have some idea what I am doing, I know how Geography, Weather, Land masses, Ecosystems, Populations, Cities, Industry Farming and many ancient and modern societies operate. I know about churches, religions, weapons, fighting systems, sword weights ( looked it up ) and I think I am shifty enough for viable work around’s for most of the pit falls so that even the most bum puckered retentive Fantasy World Watchers can toddle off and go do something more worthwhile. I have fixed the Magic there isn’t any so to speak. I have fixed the Elves and Dwarfs and Dragons, we don’t have any of these either. Language is fixed they all speak English ( or more accurately the same language but we can have some...

Ho Ho No NaNoWriMo (part 2)

If it was easy there would be no cacophony…… So when all the prevaricating and research and original thinking has been applied and the wailing and gnashing of teeth and venting of spleens has been allowed to die what path comes next. Well it turns out its pretty simple, if you want to be a writer, write. I know it’s not very helpful, of all the tasks I have undertaken it requires the hardest of things; drive from the inside. I have looked for help, for clarity what are the fundamentals that allow you to put pen to paper and write and have found some completely awesome blogs and on line help. I have followed a writer from start to finish for a fist book in the Steampunk . Thanks Literary Giant. Some very awesome no nonsense Fantasy advice from terribleminds. So here I sit typing a Fantasy novel of all things, 17 years of frothing at the mouth from pen and paper to Wordperfect to Word and on to Pages. So many first 3 chapters of really great ideas,(Probably) and thanks Chuck for brutal honesty about the writing game and Profanity Generators of truly awesome expanse I can tell you all to ****—**!!! off you dirigible **** tickling cavity marmots. So what does this fantasy world look like where every theme is a cliche and every middle aged white writers fantasy is derided for youth, ethnicity, gender, geographic relevance and RPG hate, magic systems and other  limitations. I believe you write for yourself first, hopefully you have belief enough that you have an audience and hopefully you don’t start by re-writing someone else’s Fantasy Trilogy. Not that I know anything but its a story whatever genre ( Hate that word) so it probably would not be too hard to figure out stories are character driven. So I started there, will anyone care about him. I hope so, hopefully enough to follow his journey. Gibbous Tyke, now has the responsibly to travel through the world entertaining the reader and hopefully having enough guts to stay alive to the end of a book. I am no different to everyone else who has read fantasy trilogies for ever and ever amen. Should he make it there will be an unending assault on the reader. A Trilogy in four parts no less...

Ho Ho No NaNoWriMo (part 1)

Ho Ho No NaNoWriMo (part 1)
Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to one and all. So what does a photo of Me and the Good Lady have to do with NaNoWriMo? Absolutely nothing, unless of course you understand we are all busy doing something else. Now this is not a literary site, my small week of subscribers are made up of friends and family who whether they wanted to or not I have persuaded to subscribe. So other than my good friends Hill and Kim you may have no idea what NaNoWriMo is and why I should even be mentioning it at all. As it happens I only came across it thanks to The Daily Post sending helpful suggestions to us aspiring writer/blogger types. ( Thank you and what the hell did you do that for?) So it goes like this, register with NaNoWriMo and on the 1st Nov you have 30 days to write 50,000 words. Sounds like a pretty good idea, daunting undoubtedly, exciting yes definitely,energizing and harmless? You would think so but you would be wrong. I actually thought well I have been trying to write a book who hasn’t I have three whole chapters, 50,000 words would certainly help. This is where I started to run into problems, not one to go off completely half cocked I decided to do a bit of research, the normal things are there rules to this? What experiences have others had and was there a bit of encouragement out there for so challenging a task. Well Yes and No. Did I register well no, should I have done? No I don’t think so. Will I next year who knows. I think it has a lot to do with where you are at the time. If you like the idea I would recommend doing no research at all and give it a go. I would certainly remember it has little to do with writing that Brilliant, Completed, Shiny automatically publishable Novel you have in your head. What it will do is something I have been unable to do,  generate up to 50,000 words you can use (Probably). Or 50,000 words you were glad you did not use in your novel. If you did want to do research I would try this from terribleminds.  ’25 Things You Should Know About NaNoWriMo’ So what have I...

Charlie Don’t Surf, West Street.

Charlie Don’t Surf, West Street.
Well Charlie Don’t actually surf on West Street but were playing Live at the West Street in Sheffield. On my recent trip home to the good old Steel City I get the opportunity to use my camera for more than taking pictures of beers. Its been a while since I photographed Live Bands not since my student days. To get the opportunity to see my good buddy Mark (who has had the pleasure of knowing me since before infant school ) and Charlie Don’t Surf in action was something I was looking forward to, It seemed only reasonable to offer my services to take some photos. Having been a Professional Photographer for 12 years+ it seemed like the perfect idea. And to be totally honest as ideas go one of my better ones, however this now requires me to actually put my money where my mouth is. How is this going to turn out? I had been hearing rumors of West Street its changed they say, we better warn you, you might be shocked. Well this was certainly a turn up for the books, I had spent many a year ploughing up and down West Street crawling from pub to pub. I moved in just off West Street ate at the Bombay 3 times a week ( Still don’t know what was in their curry) worked at the Job Center it was everything I knew. How crazy could it be? I remember Pajama Jumps  and other very dubious happenings. I also remember early mornings walking down to the bakery and getting fresh Parkin in November, buying cheap Bavarian larger at the corner store, lunchtimes drinking in the “Frog and Parrot” just because. On a hot summer night just returned from Europe a case of Alsace white in my hands, being collected from the station by the usual suspects. That night it was hot,we went to see “Haze” upstairs at the Hallamshire, oh what glorious days. What ever happened to Gabadon?( Don’t trust my spelling) I have photos of it all, hang around a bit follow my blog, I am not as big an ass as you think. Well probably not. Turns out they were warning me about the girls! Girls on West Street, I knew about meeting girls on West Street, well the ones hanging around the Hoover shop...

Penguins in Boxes don’t you know.

Penguins in Boxes don’t you know.
So what happened to October & November? Well to tell you the truth the same as what usually happens each October. I have a birthday and its sort of the same one each time but with a different me standing there. You would think after having nearly half a century of them I would have got the hang of it. But I do not go gently Old age should burn and rave @ close of day. November drifted away with NaNoWriMo, sort of and NaBloWriMo wasn’t what I thought it was either. I sat for a long time trying to remember as many of them as possible (Birthdays that is), although it is not recommended, the memory part of your brain  the short term part anyway forgets things unless you re-live them    (and its not completely wise to do so as  a bad memory can re-scar you as much as a good memory can hold you back. New memories is what you need something to tell you you are alive and moving forward.) This is the problem, this is where my particular kind of broken crowds in and fills up all the available memory  boxes, well the ones that are not filled with Penguins. “Insofar as she recognized at all that she was dreaming, she realized that she must be exploring her subconscious mind. She had heard it said that humans are supposed only to use about a tenth of their brains, and that no one was really clear what the other nine tenths were for, but she had certainly never heard it suggested that they were used for storing penguins.”  Douglas Adams   I read and understood this fundamental truth in 1991 and I recognized it for what it was, my universe instantly made sense here was an operating system that I understood ,this was my operating system better than windows no blue screens of death etc better than what I had before which was just plain bewilderment. Of course I have had to redefine it as new and modern technologies have become available but essentially imagine the mind is 10 square boxes 9 of them filled with Penguins and the 10th crammed with memories all of them the useful as well as the unhelpful. The entirety of  knowledge from which you have to operate….. So with a...

My Mate Marmite.

My Mate Marmite.
Tired and Jet Lagged from my homecoming I am once again back in all that is magnificent Canada. A place whose breathtaking beauty and extraordinarily wide expanses welcomes you and lets you know anything is possible for the adventurous spirit, if you are truly ready to give instead of take a reminder  that true greatness is still to come. This is the last frontier; possibly “The final front ear” (for me anyway, I don’t suppose anyone is going to give me a space ship anytime soon.) So what’s with the Marmite, well I have been thinking how to express something that I want to be understood clearly. ( So is a dark brown opaque gunk the right thing I here you ask ? Absolutely and I will tell you why.) Whilst everyone gets comfortable and ready for the story its probably a good time to mention that for some reason I can’t get my head round not everyone likes Marmite! ( and my Canadian friends may not have any idea what I am talking about, Aussies will be familiar with Vegemite. ( So will a few others thanks to “Men art work” and if you read Terry Pratchett’s “The Last Continent” there is sort of a recipe in there to give you some idea. ) Marmite is applicable because I am half expecting that sort of polarized reaction to this particular post. To Paul and anyone else who I have raised the question of living with density as a concept I take Marmite to be the quintessential denseness. ( yes I know some metals, bits of space and a fair few people also show a great amount of density, myself  included but as a metaphor I think this will nail it on the head, oh and I am also going to use Breakfast and possibly Toast as a metaphors as well, just so you know ( But you will have to work out those for your selves.) So every morning you leap? ( Please change for you appropriate morning speed) out of bed rush to the kitchen to start your Breakfast put on some Toast, open the kitchen cupboard and frantically look for your jar of Marmite. Where is it? I can’t see it, what if its been stolen or someone else has eaten it what am I going...

And did those feet in ancient times….....

And did those feet in ancient times…..
So did those feet? No doubt and mine have just made their way from Woodseats to Totley, not an inconsiderable feet. So what’s it all about “Life the Universe and everything?” To be totally honest the more I look at it the more worried I become that there is no purpose to it at all only the one you make for your self. So what makes for such a topic on a late summer afternoon Moonshine in hand (Moonshine is a beer by the way brewed by my local Abbeydale Brewery here in Sheffield.) Well I have just been up to the remembrance garden and sat talking to my Granparents memorial plac’s and had a long conversation accounting for myself. More of a thank you really as I talk to them all the time in my head but it seems more official to be where their ashes are laid to rest. Not a miserable task for me,friends relations dear departed are,like just stepped out of the room they may or may not be coming back but that does not deter me from talking to them anyway. I live on faith that they will be there when I need them and have not been let down so far; am I cavalier and thoughtless in my friendships it may seem that way but it never crosses my mind that any of those that are close to me will take affront, friendships rise and occasionally meet their demise but not really.Everything can be forgiven on your journey through life ( Now obviously there are a few grand things that pose a difficulty and I am sure those don’t need mentioning here, but I would prefer it if you didn’t rodger the wife over the back of my Ikea futon, not unless you were looking for a good slapping.) So what did my esteemed Grandfathers tell me? Nothing new I received all the venerable advice long before they passed. What I was formulating on my treck over here was something a bit more fundamental. “If a tree falls in a forest, even a very impressive old revered tree, if there is no one to bear witness did it exist at all.” That is the dilemma are we all only legends in our life times’ who will bare whiteness to our passing? Few will...

« Older Entries Next Entries »