So what happened to October & November? Well to tell you the truth the same as what usually happens each October. I have a birthday and its sort of the same one each time but with a different me standing there. You would think after having nearly half a century of them I would have got the hang of it. But I do not go gently Old age should burn and rave @ close of day. November drifted away with NaNoWriMo, sort of and NaBloWriMo wasn’t what I thought it was either.
I sat for a long time trying to remember as many of them as possible (Birthdays that is), although it is not recommended, the memory part of your brain the short term part anyway forgets things unless you re-live them (and its not completely wise to do so as a bad memory can re-scar you as much as a good memory can hold you back. New memories is what you need something to tell you you are alive and moving forward.) This is the problem, this is where my particular kind of broken crowds in and fills up all the available memory boxes, well the ones that are not filled with Penguins.
“Insofar as she recognized at all that she was dreaming, she realized that she must be exploring her subconscious mind. She had heard it said that humans are supposed only to use about a tenth of their brains, and that no one was really clear what the other nine tenths were for, but she had certainly never heard it suggested that they were used for storing penguins.” Douglas Adams
I read and understood this fundamental truth in 1991 and I recognized it for what it was, my universe instantly made sense here was an operating system that I understood ,this was my operating system better than windows no blue screens of death etc better than what I had before which was just plain bewilderment. Of course I have had to redefine it as new and modern technologies have become available but essentially imagine the mind is 10 square boxes 9 of them filled with Penguins and the 10th crammed with memories all of them the useful as well as the unhelpful. The entirety of knowledge from which you have to operate…..
So with a slight of hand and a small leap of faith the Mental Health project that is riseanddeardemise.ca has become a clever way to make room in my somewhat overcrowded 10th box ( Partly full because of the narrator in my head who refuses to leave anything behind. I relive memories good and bad day and night. I plan the future what if, fantastic idea after idea, Novel upon Novel, lifetime upon lifetime. I hope suffering this will allow something I discovered along the way to be true ” Per Ardua ad Astra” Through Adversity to the Stars.) Why am I not insane I hear you ask the answer is who says I am not. I am certainly different. but that’s no reason I shall not reach the stars I raise my mind to
So how does it all work, what sneaky plans do I have for all the stuff I have crammed in that tenth box? Well this is the truly Machiavellian part of the grand scheme. As I have not found a way to remove the Penguins and who would want to they are such an amusing bunch. Also it appears that the size of the box is fixed. So the logic goes put it all somewhere else a kind of Dropbox. So get the negatives scanned and on to a truly large hard drive, shoehorn the ideas and memories that go with them onto this Bio Blog, rant and rave lecture at local collages, work on writing a number of books get some co-conspirators. Have interesting and smart children fill their minds with fantastic possibilities. Disturb your work colleagues with imaginative ramblings.
The end result: when no one is looking you have manages to store some of your stuff in their 10th box without then even noticing.
GENIUS.